In a recent post, I talked about our shadows. It only makes sense to continue the topic and talk about projections. Welcome to today’s edition of Basic Psychological Literacy :))

In psychology, projections happen when we attribute our thoughts, traits, or emotions to others. Here are some relatable examples from both work and life.

• A coworker is late

When an employee or colleague shows up late to a meeting, instead of blaming it on traffic or a tight schedule, you immediately think, “They don’t value my time,” or “They don’t respect me.” But, hold up — psychology suggests that maybe you’re projecting your own behavior onto them. Reflect on this. Is it possible that you don’t respect others’ time when you’re late?

• Being criticized by your boss

Your manager gives some feedback, suggesting areas for improvement. Instead of viewing it as constructive criticism, you take it personally: “They don’t like me; they’re trying to humiliate me.” Most likely, this feeling is about your own insecurity. Your superior’s comment gets right into your pain point, creating a perfect and believable projection.

• Jealousy over a partner’s admiration for someone else

The woman you love genuinely admires a male acquaintance, and suddenly, you’re so jealous. You see this admiration as a threat and might even start to feel antagonistic towards your partner. What does this projection reveal? Again, this is most likely your own insecurity. Maybe when you harmlessly flirt with someone (a waitress, for example), you feel guilty and worry about your own intentions. As a result, you’re projecting those feelings onto your partner.

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Projections are incredibly common. Even though I’ve been focused on personal growth for years, I still catch myself projecting my beliefs and insecurities onto others.

One phrase I heard last year really resonated with me:

“Everyone has their own movie.”

Each of us sees the world through our unique set of qualities, experiences, traumas, and perspectives. This is why nothing in the world is truly objective — everything is filtered through our own personal lens.

So, what can we do about it?

1. Practice mindfulness: Start noticing your projections.
2. Talk it out: Discuss them with a therapist.
3. Learn to respond differently: Stop assigning traits to others that may not even be theirs!

Bonus track

Understanding projections comes with an awesome side effect — you stop making assumptions about others and taking things so personally. When someone is disrespectful, raises their voice, or says something hurtful, it’s important to know that these are just their projections.  It’s great to remember this and follow one of the essential rules, “Don’t take anything personally.”

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So, what kinds of projections do you notice in your daily life?